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The Cottage July/Lammas 2001 Issue

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Ask the Crones

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Teens and Wicca

Dear Crones,
I am a 16 year old wiccan from Tennessee. My mom is Catholic and my dad is a non practicing Baptist. I have been learning about wicca since I was 13 years old through my aunt. The reason I am writing is that I want to state my opinion on how teens are treated on most wiccan sites. I am a member of many wiccan e-groups. What bothers me is how teens are treated. Whenever we give feedback on most of the subjects, we are disregarded because of our age. I think this is unfair. I figured I would ask you if you would know the reason why? What better group to ask than a group of Crones?

-Dorothy,Tennessee

Dear Dorothy,
It is unfortunate, but we must agree your concern is valid. A few of us are moderators of our own groups and we have seen first hand how the wiccan community discrimanated against our young people. This is sad, however, you shouldn't let this discourage you. We encourage our youth to voice themselves with pride as long as it is done with respect for all the other members. Many older pagans have had bad experiences with young people demanding spells and displaying little regard for the ethics of magickal workings. There is little tolerance for those who expect Wicca/Paganism to be anything like what it has been portrayed to be by the media. Unfortunately, the acts of a few misguided youths have left some of the adults burned and with little tolerance. Please be patient and continue to share your thoughts and perception. There are many of us who value the opinions or our youths.
-Blessings
The Crones

Dear Crones,
I have a friend who has come to me many times asking me to give her a spell so that she can get her ex-husband back. What should I do?

-Amber, NY

Dear Amber,
First of all, is she really a friend? Is her request making you uncomfortable? Finally, this is one of the greater concerns, is she a wiccan? Why all the questions? Well, we need you to be aware of what it is she is asking and the position she is putting you in. If she isn't a wiccan, why would you contemplate putting yourself in the position of handing her any type of spell without her having knowledge of "The Rede". If her requests are making you uncomfortable, you need to let her know how it's making you feel. If she is truly a friend, she will stop. It seems that she wants to manipulate with anothers emotions. This is dangerous. Our advise to you is to try and redirect her energy into healing herself and letting go of the relationship. If it is meant to be, it will be on its own. If she persists, tell her you cannot assist her and do your best to make her aware of the repercussions. If all else fails, then just take yourself out of the entire situation.
-Blessings
The Crones